I have to make a decision...


I have to make a decision...

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Iambusybee
Iambusybee
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Hi, there!I feel myself trapped and in a great despair. My GP doesn’t let me get pregnantbecause of my diabetes. I can’t balance my glucose level. In addition, I have someproblems with my kidneys. My GP says that they won’t function properly duringmy pregnancy and may be a great risk both for me and my baby. I’ve visitedquite a lot of diabetes forums where ladies with diabetes share theirsuccessful stories. I would risk, but my DH is against it. He doesn’t want torisk my life. He says that we would better adopt or find a surrogate. Wedecided to start with the second variant. As we don’t have a close friend orrelative who would agree to carry and give birth to our child, we decided to gooverseas and find a respectable fertility clinic that would help us find asurrogate for our baby. We’ve got interested in two clinics. The first clinicseems to be very popular among European infertile couples. However, when wevisited the clinic, there were some things we disliked about it. Firstly, itturned to be very overcrowded. There were queues nearly everywhere. As thereweren’t vacant seats, we had to stand nearly an hour before the fertilityspecialist was ready to meet us. We quite liked the doctor in charge. Sheturned to be very attentive to every single detail. She asked us quite a lot ofquestions about both my husband’s and my health condition. These were thethings we really liked. We visited one more clinic, but I completely dislikedit. Firstly, it was very empty. There weren’t queues anywhere. The staff wasvery soothing and smiley, but I don’t know why I disliked them. Now we have tomake the choice: whether to choose the first clinic or continue searching. Whatdo you think about both these clinics? Should we deal with the first one???

P.S. Isthere anybody here who had to deal with surrogacy? Could you please share yourstories? I really need your help.


BiancaD
BiancaD
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Hi, hun. I’m really sorry to hear about your struggles. I have a cousin. She was diagnosed with diabetes when she was 21. She tried to get pregnant several times and both pregnancies ended with miscarriages. However, she finally managed to get pregnant and give birth to a lovely son. She spent lots of time in the hospital while being pregnant. She had a very good gyny and, maybe, due to her professionalism she gave a birth to a child. I think if your diabetes is a tough one, it’s better not to risk. You may browse some fertility forums to find feedbacks about surrogacy. As for the clinics, I think you should choose the clinic that really suits you. You must feel comfortable and trust them. If you don’t like certain things, it’s better to quit. I know that there are some forums where you can find feedbacks about fertility clinics around the world. You may search such forum and try to find feedbacks about the clinic you’ve got interested there. At any rate, I wish you good luck in your surrogacy journey!

Tumbleweed
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Hi! I have some problems with my kidneys and can’t get pregnant because of it. I was diagnosed with glomerulonephritis in my early twenties. The illness didn’t trouble me much until I got pregnant. My baby died when I was 20-weeks pregnant because my kidneys stopped working properly. I’m sorry for posting this. I don’t want to frighten you, but, please, be very cautious with your kidneys. I don’t think you should risk. Maybe, surrogacy is a better solution for you.

Iambusybee
Iambusybee
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Tumbleweed, I’m really sorry that you had to face all those grief and sorrow. I can only imagine what you have felt at that moment. My GP has warned me about these things. My hubby also says that we shouldn’t risk. He says we have to travel abroad to find a surrogate as we don’t have a female relative who would agree to help us here. Any ideas about this?

Iambusybee
Iambusybee
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Hi, ladies! Nice to meet you! Thanks for your replies! You may be quite right about surrogacy. However, I don’t have anybody to help us. I think it would be better if we contact a surrogacy agency or a fertility clinic to help us. What do you think about it? Is there anybody here who has experienced a surrogacy program? How did you choose a proper candidate?


Tumbleweed
Tumbleweed
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We’re going to deal with the clinic that finds surrogates for the intended parents. Like you, we don’t have any female relatives or friends who would agree to give birth to our child. We’ve got interested in one fertility clinic. The only thing it’s situated not in Australia and we have to travel there.
P.S. Once you’ve decided to deal with a fertility clinic, I would advise you to choose the one that really cares about surrogates. It’s essential to do this as your surro mum must get all necessary things to feel comfortable during her pregnancy. At any rate, I wish you good luck in your egg donation journey.
c
Iambusybee
Iambusybee
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The first clinic we’ve got interested in seems to be quite ok. They offered us to sign up a contract. According to this contract, the clinic is responsible for finding a woman who is healthy enough to be fertilized, carry and give birth to our baby. This woman will be also tested psychologically to find out whether she’s ready to be surrogate mum. The clinic’s representatives will do their best to make this woman feel comfortable during her pregnancy. They will supply her with a certain sum of money to cover her life expenses. They will also supply her with all necessary medications if it’s necessary. The woman also has to visit the clinic monthly for a medical check ups. She will have to do alcohol, smoke and drug tests to find out whether she leads a healthy lifestyle. The clinic’s representatives will also phone or pay a personal visit to a surrogate’s accommodation to check whether everything is ok. The woman will get a medical insurance. In case of premature delivery or abortion after the 12th week of pregnancy, she will get a decent money compensation. The clinic’s representatives will inform the intended parents about the surrogates health conditions monthly. They will send the results of the ultrasound check, photos and videos to the intended parents. This is the way they’re going to treat a surrogate. What do you think about it?

GO


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