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Positive bedtime routines

 
Bedtime battles can be less of a problem with a positive routine in the 20 minutes before tucking young children in for the night.

A positive routine involves your child in a series of pleasurable activities in the crucial 20-minute period before bedtime. It helps to soothe and calm your child, and ready her for sleep.

A positive routine goes hand-in-hand with any efforts to improve bedtime settling difficulties in babies, toddlers and preschool-aged children. A positive routine is almost always recommended when other behavioural strategies such as controlled comforting or camping out are used.

 
Most routines involve a mix of pre-bed tasks (bath, brushing teeth) and quiet, enjoyable activities (reading a story). The aim is to keep the atmosphere positive, using positive attention and praise.

A good bedtime routine smoothes the way for good night sleeping habits. Without a good routine, it can be hard for a baby to settle to sleep.

A routine can involve any number of activities. The key is that they are similar activities completed in roughly the same way each night.

Here is an example of a routine that can begin after dinner and a bath:

  • breastfeed or bottle-feed (outside the bedroom)
  • quiet play for 15-20 minutes (may include reading a book)
  • into bedroom
  • brief cuddle and kiss
  • into bed.

At the end of the 20-minute ‘positive period’, say goodnight. This is the time to be firm if your child resists. Be clear that it's now time for sleep and leave the room promptly.

Making a start: choosing the best bedtime

You may have an ideal bedtime in mind – somewhere between 7 pm and 8 pm for young children. But, when you are dealing with settling problems, the best bedtime to start with is one closest to when your child naturally falls asleep. For example, if you find that she finally falls asleep around 9 pm, set this as a temporary bedtime. This increases the chance that the routine will become firmly associated with the onset of sleep.

Moving your child’s actual bedtime towards your ideal bedtime

The final step of the positive routine involves bringing your child’s bedtime forward. This begins a week after introducing the ‘positive period’ and involves bringing forward the time at which you start (by five to ten minutes each week) until your child reaches your ideal bedtime.

How long will it take?

The length of time required for the positive routine to work varies according to how quickly the ‘positive period’ can be successfully shortened each week. Typically, the ‘positive period’ needs to be shortened gradually rather than quickly and the routine takes a few weeks to be effective.

Research has found that a positive routine not only helps with settling problems, it can also lead to broad improvements in the quality of parent-child relationships generally.
 
 
 
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  • Last reviewed08-05-2006
  • ReferencesAdams, L., & Rickert, V. (1989). Reducing bedtime tantrums: Comparison between positive routines and graduated extinction. Pediatrics, 84, 756-761.
  • Acknowledgements

    Adapted from: Centre for Community Child Health (2004). The Infant Sleep Study: Managing sleep problems in babies: A training manual. Royal Children’s Hospital: Melbourne; and

    Centre for Community Child Health (2006). Settling and sleeping: Research based professional resource. Downloaded from www.rch.org.au/ccch/platforms.

    The Centre for Community Child Health wishes to acknowledge the Telstra Foundation for their support in developing this resource.